Month: March 2020

Jay and I Were Born for Social Distancing

LONG before social distancing was a thing, Jay and I have been practicing this at home for thirty some years. Mind you, we have been married for forty-three and produced four children, so you can toss out the first few years. The past few decades however, we have this stuff down to perfection.
I should have known what I was getting myself into when marrying a man whose heritage is 100% German. Germans are not well known for their love and compassion. They are not known for hugging and displays of affection. They are known for being perfectionists, precise, direct, having a dark sense of humor, being distant and apparently are good bread bakers as well as beer drinkers.* Jay has all these qualities covered except the last two. We leave the bread baking to our son Jason. (* Source: Google)
There were a few hints along our dating journey that should have stuck out for me, like he didn’t like to hold hands, no PDF (public displays of affection) and we were engaged for three years because he apparently wasn’t in a hurry, or was he just social distancing back then?
I, on the other hand, am affectionate and a hugger. When I meet people for the first time I always find myself touching their arm or shoulder, I don’t even realize I do it, so as to make that human contact. If I know you, I am going to hug you, I may hug you if I don’t.
My heritage is a mixed bag like most Americans. I am Scottish, Irish, German (dad’s side) Norwegian and Danish (mom’s side). As you can see, there were lots of genetic chances in there to be a good baker, again, I am not as you well know. I’m not sure where the hugging came from but it’s always been that way.
It’s very true in our case that opposites attracted, more like collided. He is a perfectionist and I’m sure that’s what makes him such a great carpenter. I am not. I can toss things together without a care whether I am cooking, trying to knit or sew, or baking – again, why I am not a good baker.
My mom was a great baker, seamstress and knitter. She baked cakes and sewed clothing for people in my town as a hobby while working full time. I didn’t inherit her sewing or knitting skills either. When I was in junior high we had to take a sewing class and a cooking class. My mom used to leave the room when I would be laying out the pattern on my material because I’m sure it drove her crazy. I would just pin pieces here and there, not worrying about trying to make the most out of my material space. I believe I got a D- in that class. I never attempted cooking at home back then, like today, I don’t enjoy it and I’m pretty sure I got a D in that class, or it may have been an F.
Back to social distancing. So, I snore. Loudly. At least that’s what my husband, children, and grandchildren have all told me, but I’m still skeptical. What does snoring have to do with social distancing you ask? Let me tell you a short tale.
After giving birth to my last baby, I had a back problem. I started sleeping downstairs on our couch with baby #4 nearby in her crib when she wasn’t laying on me. The couch gave me great back support and I slept somewhat better.
When Brittney (aka #4) was older and could sleep upstairs, I continued to sleep on the couch for comfort. Back then I used to sleep fairly sound. Late one night I had awakened around 3 a.m. and a white orb of light went floating past me. For real. I will take a lie detector test on this, I am not making this up. Needless to say I slept with the lights on for YEARS after that, and continued to wake around 3. That story, by the way, is for another day.
After many years of sleeping on the couch, I mentioned to my family I might try sleeping in our bedroom again to which there was a strong suggestion that I snored very loudly and everyone upstairs could hear me. Perhaps my staying downstairs was for the better of all in the house, “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.” (Ghost’s opinion not included). The dogs and I continued to sleep downstairs, lights on. Social distancing had begun.
Another thing that is the opposite with Jay and I is what we like to watch on TV. I love movies, I love comedy and drama, action, sci-fi and mystery. Jay likes sports, news, old rock bands and reality TV that involves singing or talent. When we were first married and before DVR’s and DHS tape recorders were invented, we shared a single TV. He would watch TV and I would read a book in the same room until he went to bed. Then if there was something on late at night, I’d watch it. Remember we only had about four channels to choose from as well, so often it was disappointing.
Then the era came of being able to record a show on TV and watch it later. I got into the habit of watching recorded shows late at night, a habit I still have. To this day I DVR every single program and either read, knit or write in the evening until late and then I watch my DVR’d programs, and bonus, I can skip all commercials.
Since our first house, we acquired a second TV, four children and a second room to put it in that became the “family room” or “den” or as the grandkids call it – grandpa’s room. In the house we currently live in he has his den room and I have the living room. We each watch our own TV shows and enjoy our separate bedrooms although I am still pretty much a couch sleeper. More social distancing, we got this!
If you’d ask our children, they will confirm that we have been happily practicing social distancing for decades. I credit part of the reason we’ve been married for so long is due to our social distancing. The only time we are in the same place is at the supper table or in the car and then we practice not talking as per Jay’s German heritage not mine, so again, keeping a social distance through language.
Luckily, I have two dogs at home who entertain me and tolerate me hugging them and lavishing attention on them. Ok, Kutter, aka Mr. Kuddles, loves it. Jazzy will tolerate it on her own terms similar to a cat. Forget hugging Jay! My son Josh sent us a picture that had “Kiss me I’m Irish” all crossed out and instead it said, “Don’t touch me, I’m German”. Perfect. Jay needs that t-shirt. My kids and most of my grandkids are huggers too, a little German heritage snuck into a couple of them.
Jay and I have had this social distancing stuff down to an art for at least three decades. If you need any tips or advice on social distancing, I’d tell you to ask Jay the expert, but he’s not going to answer you. He doesn’t even answer his cell phone if I call him. I’m so thankful every day that I married a 100% German.
Until next time…
Stay home, keep your distance.
Toni

Dreams of Being a Hermit

This COVID-19 virus has everyone locked down at home. Right now no one knows for how long – weeks, months? With all of this hand washing and social distancing I am beginning to feel like Howard Huges (if you are young you may have to Google him). So what to do with all that time alone?
Most people hate being stuck at home. They don’t know what to do or how to entertain themselves for that long without any real social contact. Not me, I was born for this.
This is the kind of situation people like me tend to flourish at. While I am a very extroverted person when I am in a public or in a social situation, my heart has always been that of a hermit or a loner if you will. Shocking, I know!
I love my own company. I can entertain myself endlessly with no one else around. I actually enjoy being alone, all by myself with no other interaction. I’m sure there is some social scale that would tell me what my personality is, but I don’t know those statistics. I just know I’m ok with solitude. I love it!
I’m sure it seems at odds to be so outgoing in the public but when at home or when I can, I love being alone. The only thing I miss is being around my children and grandchildren right now as they are helping me stay safe by not coming by to visit. There are several modern ways to communicate via video chats that help, but a hug from a grandchild is a special tug at the heart that can’t be replaced electronically. I truly miss that!
Having two dogs follow me around all day also help entertain me. Kutter, like me, loves to nap, so we are nap buddies. Jazzy keeps us both on our toes with her antics and wanting to play, so I get my workout chasing after her and throwing her ball or toys for her to fetch. She’s still working on the “drop” command part. They both miss our weekly trips to town for groceries, but we are all getting a lot of outdoors time to make up for it.
I’m an avid TV watcher, movie watcher, so I can literally waste days in the vast caverns of television. I’m not even picky about shows that are in black and white as I grew up with those after all. I can flip between comedy and mystery, action and drama, just not love stories, they’ve never been my “thing”. I’m watching past favorite TV series right now from beginning to end. I’m currently watching Sleepy Hollow in case you were curious.
I also love to read, so I either have a book in hand or I’m listening to books, either way I’m happy. I’ve been into biographies lately, not sure why. Stephen King and others like him are still at the top of my lists, as are mysteries, Martha Grimes is my top author there. Currently I’m listening to The Institute by Stephen King. Next up is The Radium Girls by Kate Moore, a dear friend of mine recommended it. Thanks Sue!
As you know from previous blogs, I won’t be spending my time at home baking and I’m trying not to do too much cooking either, just enough to keep us fed and Jay not complaining too much. I like to make soups, the meal that keeps on giving. One huge pot of chili can give us meals for a week or two. Microwave a bowl full, that’s my idea of cooking.
I started at the beginning of winter (yes, I said winter) by knitting scarves to hang on parking meters for those without one. I got one and a half done. Perhaps I can get a couple more completed while on this lock down. I never said I was a speedy knitter, or an accomplished one. After years of knitting I am still best at rectangles and squares.
I try to do some writing every day but some days my creative genes seem to be aging as fast as my blue jeans. I could try my hand at art again, although I’m not nearly as talented as my children. Somewhere in my bedroom, the one that has become more of a giant closet over the years, there are some markers, pencils and paints. I should work on digging those out and see what happens.
This could also be a great time to do some deep cleaning and try to get rid of some more things that are just taking up space. The closet where all my holiday decorations are has become a giant disaster ready to burst at the seams. The kitchen could always do with some once overs, but I don’t want to get too crazy about this, Jay might begin to wonder about my sanity.
If it ever warms up, this being Iowa that could take several months yet, I might start a daily walking routing around my driveway and work my way up to my bicycle, providing my tires are still functioning. I don’t have to worry about neighbors prying, as they are a quarter of a mile away at the closest. If I could ever get Jazzy to learn to heal, she might enjoy walking with me. Right now it’s a game of tug of war with her.
Being a temporary hermit for me is not a bad thing. I’m enjoying my self quarantined status, trying to stay calm and safe. I’m continuing with my writing and perhaps art. Avoiding the temptation to become a “baker” and a “cook” and staying true to myself as a TV loving ne’ar-do-well. I’m listening to several of my favorite pastors online and I’m putting faith before fear, and I hope you are too.
Stay home, stay safe, be well.
Until next time….
Toni

Tea Time!

As a child I hated tea. I had only ever been offered ice tea but I found the taste of it horrible to my young taste buds. My neighbor girl Debbie’s family were big ice tea drinkers.
I remember every summer when I was over at their house, which was most days, she’d pour herself a tall glass of ice tea into those multicolored aluminum tumblers that were so cool to drink out of. I refused every time and always wished I liked tea. It smelled good to me and to hear the clink of ice in those aluminum cups was such an invitation to drink, but not for me.
My parents were not tea drinkers either if I am recalling right. They were coffee people and I grew up a coffee person. Straight black coffee. Yum! Later when fancy coffee places became a thing I was introduced to a “white chocolate mocha latte” by my oldest daughter Torri. It became my new thing and I found a coffee creamer that when added to my home brewed coffee mimicked the fancy version almost perfectly. I was set for life, or so I thought.
During the time I was staying at Torri’s to help out for a while, she also introduced me to hot tea. I was very hesitant at first, recalling my childhood dislike of tea, but found I did like the pleasant flavors. The next thing I knew I was trying flavored ice teas as well and settled on peach tea as my number one choice. Well look at me, I was now a coffee AND tea person. Debbie would be proud.
Several months or more ago, as I age I lose track of time, my acid reflux disease decided to make a hearty comeback. No more coffee or tea or anything with acid, or fizzy, or minty or spicy. Most of the food and drink world were eliminated in one fell swoop. Now what was I to do?
Thankfully near me there is a sweet little “tea cellar” shop that sells all kinds of loose leaf teas. I had collected many various tea strainers and tea cups and saucers to have my teas in over the years, now I needed to find a tea I could still drink and not upset the stomach with too much acid.
Rooibos tea is one of those teas and this little shop had a few flavors I tried out. I had to eliminate several due to mint being an ingredient or a citrus being an ingredient, but then I found my golden tea – Bourbon St. Vanilla. Lightly sweet taste with just the right amount of vanilla. Add to it a good splash of my almond vanilla creamer and I am almost back to my long ago white chocolate vanilla flavor! Heaven in a cup.
I have learned a few things about making my tea. It’s ok just to nuke the water in your coffee cup, tea pots are optional, although they are pretty cool. You don’t need a special tea strainer to put your tea in, just go to the shop and buy a pack of their medium tea filter papers. I like about a tablespoon or more of tea in my filter rather than the teaspoon or two that the tea packs say. I also like to let mine steep for a bit longer than the usual five minutes.
If you go to a “home” goods type store for $3 you can buy a pair of “pot watchers” that work perfectly to “clip” your tea filter bag into your cup of hot water, and no tea leaves in the bottom of your cup. I also found I prefer the taste of almond vanilla creamer over regular vanilla creamer and can only find it at the big “T” store. I’ve included photos because I don’t get paid for advertising and can’t just throw out brand names willy-nilly, (hence all the ” “) but I think you can figure it out.
So while we may all be staying home for a while, I hope you will brew yourself a nice “cuppa”, enjoy a good book or re-watch some of your favorite TV shows. If you try my brand, let me know what you think. Stay safe.
Until next time…
Toni

Let Me Repeat – I Am NOT A Baker

Recently I have been going through my cookbooks trying to pare down a few. I have a TON of cookbooks, like a library’s worth. Some might think I’m doing what the Swede’s call “death cleaning” (they should think of a better term) or that I am decluttering. My children would call it thankful they don’t have to deal with it. I’m just culling the herd.
You would probably assume a person with as many cookbooks as I have, that I must be a pretty good cook and a darn good baker. You would be absolutely – WRONG. I dislike cooking and I HATE baking, mainly because I am so horrible at it, and have no patience for it. I have all of these cookbooks because I like looking at well cooked/baked food and I can still have dreams, can’t I?
Whatever genetic coding for baking I was supposed to get, I did not. My maternal grandmother was Danish and she was an awesome baker. My mother was a good cook and an awesome baker. My cousins are awesome bakers – oh and quilters! That was another gene that passed me by on my mom’s side. My children are all good cooks and great bakers (they can also quilt a bit), so why did it skip me?
I’m okay as a cook. I am not a fancy cook and as I explained in the last blog I only get to cook about six different meals, so no chance to hone those skills. It’s baking that hates me and the feeling is mutual. Once in a great while by some miraculous occurrence I will turn out something great when I bake, but the odds are against it.
When I was first married I baked a “from scratch” apple pie, crust and all. My mother-in-law who was also a great baker, even said it was a really good pie. But it was a one time fluke. My next attempts at pie baking were disasters and I shut that down immediately. I know when I am beaten.
When my children were little and had to bring treats to school they were always sent with store purchased cupcakes or cookies. I was never one of those over-achiever moms. At Christmas only, I can make the best sugar cookies ever, it’s my absolute one thing I am proud to bake, but I’ve goofed those up many times over the years as well.
Another thing that has a fifty-fifty chance of turning out ok for me are chocolate chip cookies. I don’t like the puffy ones, or the crispy ones, or the ones with lots of stuff added to them. I like the flat chewy ones like my mother-in-law made, hers were my favorite. I finally got so I could get that result most of the time and it’s because I don’t measure things accurately.
My children cringe when I am making something that requires actual measuring. I rarely use a liquid measuring cup, I just grab one of my plastic cups out of the drawer, the ones they tell me are for dry ingredients. A cup is a cup I tell them. My kids measure with precision, some even measure by weight, but that’s getting just crazy. This isn’t science after all….
The whole problem with baking is precision. I am NOT a precise person. Almost everything I do is by the seat of my pants including cooking. It has led me to some adventures in my life and my cooking has had some interesting outcomes. Quite often when I am cooking I have not checked for all the ingredients first and so I am also trying to substitute something, at varying degrees of success. Ah but baking, apparently you have to use all the correct measuring tools and measure each and every teaspoon or cup exactly. You also need all of the correct ingredients. I don’t have time for that.
If I want a cake or a muffin, I usually go buy one. I’ve learned my lessons over the years. Doing all that fussy measuring and mixing in just the right order just to end up with a disaster, who needs that? I know where to go buy my favorites, I’m good, thank you.
When I do attempt to bake something it is usually a last minute decision and never a wise one. For instance, last night at eleven-thirty I got the idea to bake a box of brownies that had been sitting in my cupboard for weeks. Yes, ever the optimist I do buy baked goods mixes. The idea came because my daughter Brittney had baked these beautiful brownies and had given me two earlier that day and now I was longing for more gooey chocolate goodness.
I heated the oven to 350 degrees and mixed together the box mix as instructed. Luckily brownies are not too complicated, eggs, water, vegetable oil. I did not have any vegetable oil and was thinking of using applesauce because I thought I’d read somewhere you can substitute that for oil in baking. I remembered Jay had this buttery vegetable oil that he uses when he makes hash browns. It had the words “vegetable oil” in it, that will work.
I also don’t have a 9 x 13 pan (because I don’t bake) so I used this smaller pan that looks like it’s 6 x 10 or something. I buttered the bottom of the pan as the box said to “grease it”, poured in my mix and popped it in the oven for thirty minutes because the box said forty for a 9 x 13. About ten minutes into the baking I got the sudden notion that maybe some mini chocolate candies would be good in part of the brownies. You can never have enough chocolate.
Now here is where it turns ugly, you bakers may want to turn away. Instead of taking the pan out of the oven and sprinkling part of the brownies with a few candies like a normal person would, I grabbed a handful of candies, opened the oven door, and tried to chuck a few on top of the brownies without burning my hand on the top oven rack. Brilliant, right?
A few fell onto one corner of the brownies, the rest landed on the bottom of the stove or on my new pizza stone that was on the rack under the pan. Before you judge my thinking remember it is now after midnight. Needless to say all the missed candies were then burning up and smoking the entire rest of the time. I was truly amazed that the smoke alarm did not go off when I opened the oven door later to retrieve my brownies. My smoke alarm near the kitchen gets a good work out, we never have to test those batteries. I was also worried my brownies would taste like smoke, I am happy to say they did not.
The thing about brownies is that it is hard to tell when they are done. I did what the box said about the toothpicks and they came out clean, I touched the top of them to see if they bounced back, I read that somewhere too, but maybe it only applies to cakes. I think they were done, I wasn’t chancing any more candies smoking away anyway, so I shut the oven down and called it good. Brownies are so naturally gooey it’s hard to tell. I’m eating them regardless. They’re chocolate.
Until next time…
Toni